If you've read this far, you're probably thinking you're about to read some very heartfelt story, possibly with a bitter taste of satire, about my horrible, horrible struggles with alcoholism. This is not the case. No, this post is about coffee[2].
I'm not an alcoholic. I am, however, addicted to coffee.
How do I even get off comparing coffee addiction to alcoholism, and what does all this have to do with the headline in the first place, you ask? Well, turns out it's perfectly possible to combine the two, according to this article on AOL:
Coffee May Protect Liver From Alcohol, Study Says
By CARLA K. JOHNSON, AP
CHICAGO (June 12) - Coffee may counteract alcohol's poisonous effects on the liver and help prevent cirrhosis, researchers say.
In a study of more than 125,000 people, one cup of coffee per day cut the risk of alcoholic cirrhosis by 20 percent. Four cups per day reduced the risk by 80 percent. The coffee effect held true for women and men of various ethnic backgrounds.
...
Of course, there is a better way to avoid alcoholic cirrhosis of the liver, Klatsky said.
"The way to avoid getting ill is not to drink a lot of coffee, but to cut down on the drinking" of alcohol, he said.
I'm quoting that last part from the article merely in the event some underage person is reading this blog.
Tempestas Nordica disclaimer: this blog and its author are to be in no way held responsible for any liver damage sustained in the course of reading the entries on this blog.
I've long been a proponent of coffee. For a brief period of time (a couple of weeks) I attempted being a non-coffee drinker. Or a coffee non-drinker. Whatever. Ultimately I started drinking again, was my point[3].
I think it should be mandatory to drink coffee; coffee has so many wonderful effects.
Did you know coffee can cure baldness? Well, if the English-language edition of Pravda is to be believed, anyway:
Coffee to cure baldness
German medics arrived at the conclusion that consumption of large caffeine doses prevents baldness.
Male's hormone testosterone is responsible for baldness in men, meaning that the more testosterone a man as [sic], the more prone he is to losing his hair.
...
According to an expert-cosmetologist Adolf Klenka, ?one would need to consume 60-80 cups of coffee per day for the caffeine to reach hair follicles.?
...
"...We did prove however that caffeine should be used as an external substance that should be applied directly onto the scalp.?
Although, to be honest, my receding hairline has yet to be affected by my coffee intake. It should be noted, however, that I'm not quite up to 60 cups a day[4].
[1] Yeah, who woulda thunk it?
[2] I have a feeling coffee may become a recurring theme on this blog. My first idea was to name the blog Confessions of a Coffee Addict, but obviously that had been used about a million times already. No original ideas left in this world, I tell ya.
[3] I am a person of little will power. Thank Hasselhoff I never took up smoking.
[4] ...yet.
